There are many “fear not” verses through Joshua, and with contemporary eyes it is a hard book to read. Wars. Battles Death.
I sat on these verses in my prayer time for a few weeks. Often, the other nations waged war against Israel, like when 5 kings conspired to lure them into battle in Joshua 10 or in Joshua 11 when a whole horde of kings gathered to unsuccessfully defeat them. Self-defense, right? There were times, however, when God led the charge, like with Jericho. How do we understand this complexity? We also can’t avoid this verse:
For it was the LORD’s doing to harden their hearts that they should come against Israel in battle, in order that they should be devoted to destruction and should receive no mercy but be destroyed, just as the LORD commanded Moses.
Joshua 11:20 ESV
It was the Lord’s doing.
That sat like a rock in my gut, and while in the past I would have “explained it away” with my Christian upbringing, I’m learning to let the hard things linger a bit and let God show me the answers from His perspective.
So I let it simmer. Then one day during worship, as we sang about the sovereignty of God in the throne room of Heaven, my eyes were opened to the holy perfectness of God. His is over all. Nothing is close to His equal. He has a plan, He reigns, and no one can oppose Him. All truths I knew, but they sank deep into my soul as I regarded how completely separate He is. I saw in the Heavens time pass as kings and rulers and authorities rose and fell in succession. My own fears of our own nation started to seep away in surrender and trust.
I saw that all people – every human who has ever existed – exists for His purpose and His timing. We all are just a breath. So whether we fall by the sword, a disease, or an accident, we all meet our end in His perfect timing and plan.
This grandness can sometimes make me feel futile, but then the personalization came next. He loves each and every one of us. He saw and spared those, like Rahab, who heard of the God of Israel and had faith. He met personally with Joshua and gave Him courage. He hears our anxious whimpers as we call out to Him in our confusion and fears.
God is so (insert word for ‘big’ that can come close to describing one who is so great – I can’t think of one.) And so personal. Close. Intimate. Compassionate. Kind. Loving.
Both at the same time.
I often find that I need to sit with the extremes and let them be there on the table of my mind together.
That’s the case here. I can let the truths rest, side by side, and one day, perhaps in eternity, my heart with understand. But for now, I can rest in His love.
